


Good Ideas

by Zetal (Rodinia)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean is a Little Shit, Discussions of Sexual Assault, M/M, Spoilers through 12.02, Stupid Canon Anyway, discussions of torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-16
Updated: 2016-11-16
Packaged: 2018-08-31 07:50:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8570434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rodinia/pseuds/Zetal
Summary: "What if Dean, being the jerk that he is, and very much a brother, when Mary meets Cas, Dean says it’s Sam’s boyfriend, cause Dean is an ass like that, and then of course he asks where Sam is. and cue the pain." - spangelbangerThe idea amused me so much I had to write it.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [spangelbanger](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spangelbanger/gifts).



Dean said this was their place. His and Sam’s. So when Mary encountered a strange man, instinct took over and she got a gun pointed at him. “Who are you?”

The strange man didn’t seem bothered at all by the gun as he took a couple steps toward her. “Who are you, and where is Sam?”

Mary had no idea what she was supposed to say in answer to the first question, and she didn’t have an answer to the second question. She took a step backwards, forcing her hands steadier holding the gun.

“Whoa! Whoa!” Dean ran in and got in the way of Mary’s shot. “He’s a friend. Cas! Hey.”

Cas glanced over at Dean very briefly before returning to glare at Mary. Then he looked back again, shock all over his face. “Dean? You’re alive!” Cas threw his arms around Dean.

Dean looked a little uncomfortable as he returned the hug. “Yeah. Long story, I’ll tell you later. Where’s Sam?”

“He’s not here?” Now Cas shrank in on himself a little, not able to meet Dean’s eyes. “I’m sorry. When we got back to the Bunker, there was a woman waiting for us. I don’t know who she was or what she wanted. She blew me away. She must have taken Sam.”

“Are you a hunter?”

Both men jumped a little. “No, I’m an angel.”

“He’s an angel,” Dean said at the same time. “You know, wings, halo, harp, all that jazz.”

“I don’t have a harp.”

Dean smothered a laugh. “Mom, this is Castiel. He’s the best possible ally in tracking down Sam. He doesn’t need to sleep, and he’s Sam’s boyfriend.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes. “Dean…”

Dean went to the table. “You said a woman? Not an angel, not a demon…”

“No, just a regular human woman.”

“Good.” Dean opened a…

“Is that a computer?” That was the only thing that made sense to Mary, seeing the keyboard and the screen, but it was so small! And not even plugged in.

Castiel nodded. “I don’t trust them.”

But Dean had something. A car, with license plates. Mary didn’t even pretend to understand how he’d gotten it. There’d be time for Dean to teach her everything she needed to know – after they’d recovered Sam.

 

The driver of the car was not very helpful. Cas headbutted him. “That’s an angel?” He sure didn’t live up to what she’d always been taught angels were. She’d never imagined angels headbutting people for not being helpful enough.

“Yeah, well… he’s hunting Sam.” Mary had to smile. Yet another way angels were not what she’d imagined – the idea of an angel being someone’s boyfriend would never have occurred to her. It was a little weird adapting to the idea of her baby having a boyfriend, for that matter. But from how casually Dean had thrown it out there, like it was no big deal… maybe it wasn’t anymore.

At the farmer’s market, Mary looked around in disbelief. A family staring at tiny computers, unbelievable in themselves, but they were completely ignoring each other. How could a family be together without actually being together?

“I remember my first days on Earth. It was… jarring.” Castiel handed Mary a coffee. “I know how difficult this must be for you.”

Mary sipped her coffee. “Everything’s so… different. But right now, at least, I’ve got something to focus on. Keep me from being overwhelmed.” A van with a veterinarian’s logo on the side passed. “Hey. Check it out.”

Castiel followed her gaze. “I don’t understand.”

“There was blood in the Bunker. So either Sam or his captor were wounded, and a vet’s less likely to ask questions or report treating a kidnapped person to the police.”

“Good thinking, Mom.” Dean picked up his coffee. “No one here’s seen anything, so it’s worth a try.”

The veterinarian wasn’t particularly helpful, at first. “Hurt him.” Dean looked shocked, but the vet started talking then. They got a phone number, and, apparently, a phone. Even phones were different now.

One thing that hadn’t changed… Dean was still super protective of his little brother. She remembered him threatening a friend’s son once for saying that Sammy was just a dumb old baby who wasn’t worth anything. In front of her friend, Mary played the scolding mother, explaining to Dean that it wasn’t nice to tell people you would rip off their ears and stuff them down their throat and he shouldn’t do it again. Once her friend was gone, and Dean was playing with his firetruck, Mary retreated to her bedroom and let out the laughter.

It wasn’t cute, now. Mary had no doubt Dean meant every word he said to the woman who had taken Sam. Breaking the phone… Mary was a little scared. “Is he always like this?” she whispered to Cas as they headed out to the car.

“Yes. Well, usually. If there’s not something going on that makes him not himself. But that’s a very long story that can wait until you’re a little more comfortable on Earth and we have Sam back and safe.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“Where’s everyone else? Other friends? It can’t just be the three of you, can it?” Even as stubborn as Samuel Campbell had been, he had friends. And the entire Campbell family. Mary wondered what had happened to them. Maybe she should try to make contact. John wouldn’t have gone to them, and they probably wouldn’t have worked with him if he had, so maybe the boys didn’t know they had family out there.

“It often feels like it is. I honestly don’t know why we haven’t already called Jody. She and Sam are fairly close, and as a sheriff she could be helpful.” Castiel got into the back seat. “But, really, Dean is stubborn. I doubt it will be long before he tries to tell you not to come. He’s only letting me help because he knows perfectly well that there’s no way I’m sitting this out, especially knowing that Sam’s hurt. I can heal his leg much more thoroughly than an animal doctor willing to sell his principles for money.”

“Not to mention anything they’ve done to him since?” Mary was sick at the thought of her baby being tortured, but people who were willing to shoot someone were probably not just inviting him over for a cup of tea.

“Exactly. Sam’s been through so much, he can take so much more pain than most people would think possible… which only means that his captors will have to go so much further.”

“Well that’s cheerful,” Dean said as he got behind the wheel. “Come on. Keep those thoughts positive, huh?”

 

When they got back to the Bunker, Dean looked up the phone number. Apparently it was from Missouri. Cas took off, promising to search the town while Dean and Mary tried to dig up anything they could on the people who took Sam. Mary chafed at sitting at home, especially with Cas’s words about Dean trying to leave her out of the hunt for her own son. Not that she knew what to say to Sam when they found him.

“Dean, how am I supposed to face Sam? Everything he’s been through, all of this… it’s my fault.”

“Mom, no. It’s not. I know about your deal – the first time I timetraveled to meet you, I found out. But that doesn’t mean it’s your fault. Blame Yellow Eyes if you need someone to blame.”

“But still… if I hadn’t made that deal…”

“Then Sammy and I don’t exist because Dad’s still dead. Okay? This ain’t your fault, and neither of us blames you.”

“Everything’s so different. I know, it’s been thirty years, but I hear Sam and I think of my sweet little baby with the terrible nightmares.”

“The nightmares? How’s a baby have nightmares?”

Mary shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know that sometimes, Sam would scream in the middle of the night. He wasn’t hungry, wouldn’t take food, and the only way to calm him down was to take him to see you. Thank god you always slept like a rock.”

“Huh. That’s… that’s really weird, Mom.”

“But when we find Sam… my sweet baby’s going to be a man, and a hunter. I’m not going to know him at all.”

“It’ll be fine, Mom. I swear. You’ll know Sammy when you see him, I promise. And he will be overjoyed to see you.”

 

Cas called the next morning – he’d found Sam. He thought. It was warded, so he couldn’t get in to look. And just like Cas had said, Dean tried to talk her into staying behind. Mary wasn’t having it. Cas looked surprised to see her, and played along when Dean tried to get her to stay back. “I can’t go in because of the warding. If I stay here alone, I’ll drive myself crazy worrying about Sam.”

Mary reluctantly agreed. As soon as Dean disappeared around a corner, Cas handed Mary a gun. “I have a feeling you’ll be needed. Go. Be careful.”

“What about…”

“If you stay here with me, then we’ll both be driving ourselves and each other crazy, and Dean has no backup. Watch for warding traps, keep yourself hidden, but go save Sam.” Castiel stepped back and nodded.

Mary had to be grateful for Castiel’s bad feeling when she saw Dean chained up and the British bitch they were after holding a knife to his eye. “Get the hell away from my boys.”

Sam gasped. “Mom?”

That was Sam. He looked terrible. But there wasn’t time to think about it. Princess Angrypants was a fighter. And she wasn’t alone. If the guy hadn’t come in with Castiel, Mary would be telling Dean to shoot just on principle. The guy promised that he wanted to be friends, to work together, but Mary didn’t believe him. Cas took his number, more to get rid of him than because he actually thought they should work together.

As soon as the Brits were gone, Castiel was at Sam’s side, dropping to his knees to look at Sam’s foot. There were three very nasty-looking burns on it. Cas reached out to touch them, and Mary watched in shock as they disappeared. Cas got back up. “Between that foot and your leg, how were you standing up?”

Sam shrugged. “How are Dean and Mom even here?”

“Oh. Sam.” Castiel reached out, taking Sam’s left hand and squeezing the palm. “This is real, Sam. You’re not going to wake up back in that chair, back in pain. I take it they gave you hallucinations?”

“Yeah. Real or not, can we… can we get out of here? Please? I’ve had enough of this room.”

“Is there anything else that needs healing before you try to walk to the car?”

“No. The foot was the only really bad thing. Let’s go.” Sam started limping towards the stairs, hesitating as he approached the door but pushing it open. He looked a little surprised when it opened, but he took off, moving as quickly as he could.

He was at the Impala when the others caught up. “Thank god. It’s here. It’s… what happened to the back?”

“Oh. A British woman crashed into us, attacked us. Had some sort of magic that meant she could take down Cas, too. Kind of assuming she was with these others.” Dean grinned proudly. “Mom killed her.”

“Oh my god. Mom. I’m so… you wanted out of hunting, and now you’re already back in?”

“It’s okay, Sam. You being safe is always the most important thing to me. If that means I go on a hunt, then give me a gun and point me at the bad guys.”

“Still…”

“Sam? Are you good?” Sam nodded, so Castiel turned to go. “I’ll meet you three back at the Bunker.”

Sam stared in disbelief. “You’re driving a pickup now?”

“It was the first vehicle I could get my hands on after the banishing spell.”

“Okay, this is real. I would never have come up with that one.”

“Do you think it’s crappy?”

Sam grinned, and he looked so much younger as something like happiness touched his eyes. Still not young enough for Mary to really be comfortable with, but that wasn’t his fault. “I’m sorry, okay? I like it.”

“Good.” Castiel headed off to his truck, and Sam got into the back seat of the Impala.

Mary got into the car and turned to look at Sam. “No hug for you?”

Sam blinked a couple times. “Huh. It’s just as well, really. I’m a little… between the hallucinations and the beatings and the cuts, it’d probably be a bad idea.” Sam stretched out across the back seat. “Mom, Dean, I know you guys want to hear what happened, but Toni and her friends didn’t exactly let me sleep much, and Dean, you know I'm gonna have nightmares back home. So if it’s all right with you, I’m gonna sleep on the way back.”

Dean nodded and turned on the radio, finding a soft rock station. "Knocks Sam right out," he explained. "I used to sing him 'Hey Jude', but eventually, he got old enough to where it mattered that I can't sing."

 

Cas may have had a head start, but Dean drove like… like John. He was so comfortable behind the wheel, so natural at handling the Impala, that it hurt. It kind of drove home just how long she’d been gone. Her Dean was barely big enough to drive a kiddie car, and here he was driving the family car like it was part of him. So even with stopping for dinner, they got back pretty much at the same time as Cas. Mary turned to wake Sam.

“Mmm. Something smells good.” Sam got out of the car. If she hadn’t seen him in the basement, Mary wouldn’t have believed he’d just been through torture.

“Sam.” Castiel came over. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m good, Cas. Really, I just need to shake this off. Not gonna sleep well, though.”

“If you want help, I’m here.”

Sam smiled and went to hug Cas. “I know. We need to talk anyway, so I’ll come find you.”

“We do?” Castiel pulled back and searched Sam’s eyes.

“The crap we’ve both been through lately? Yeah. We do.” Sam clapped Cas’s shoulder.

 

After dinner, Mary went to an unused bedroom. Dean was disappointed in her, and Sam… Sam was standing in her doorway. “Mom?”

“Hi, Sam. Come on in.”

“Thanks.” Sam came in, hands behind his back. “I just… I just wanted to say thanks. And I know… I know what it’s like to come back from the dead, and not feel like you fit. So if you want to talk, I’m here for you.” He pulled his hands out, holding a leather-bound book. “This was Dad’s journal. He and Dean kept me out of the loop on a lot of things, and then when I got out…”

“Why did you come back, Sam?”

Sam gave her a sad smile. “Because this is what I am. It’s what my family is. I think I’d have come back anyway, eventually, but I came back because I had to. Because hunting caught up to me and destroyed the safe and normal life I was trying to build. Anyway.” Sam offered the book to her. “This was Dad’s journal. When I came back, I sat down and read it, and it filled in a lot of blanks for me. And maybe it can do the same for you.”

“I missed out on so many things… mother things. Your first steps, your first crush… you… did John know?”

“Know what?”

“That you… that you’re… I don’t even know the right way to say this. That you like men.”

Sam looked incredibly startled, and somewhat angry. “You know? How?”

“Dean told me. Not exactly, I guess I kind of assumed from the fact that you have a boyfriend, but…”

“I don’t have a boyfriend. If I had a boyfriend, don’t you… oh.” Sam stopped and chuckled, anger draining away. “Let me guess. Dean said Cas is my boyfriend.”

“Yeah. If he’s not, he sure does a good job of acting like he is. He cares a lot about you, Sam. Obviously, I don’t know anything about your relationship with him. But you might… I’m doing the mom thing here. I like him. You should date him.”

Sam ducked his head, hiding a huge grin. “Advice noted. And Mom? Having you here? It’s filled in the biggest blank for me.”

Mary got up and moved to hug Sam. It certainly wasn’t like hugging her baby. Sam got huge! But he melted into the embrace, holding on tight, and for the first time she actually felt like this man's mom.

 

Sam had honestly meant to go find Cas right away. But after the talk with his mom, he couldn’t. Not yet. He stared at the ceiling fan, flashing back to another fan he’d watched after talking to his mother and heard support from her that had surprised him. That time, he’d known it wasn’t real. This time… he wasn’t so sure. It seemed to have a decent balance between things going well and things being awkward, not like that hallucination of… not like the hallucination that had felt so good he should have known it wasn’t real.

He got to his feet. Staring at the ceiling fan wouldn’t do anything to help him. He needed to be focused on where he was, not lost in the past. He also needed to get his heart back under control. He’d accepted a long time ago that loving Cas and keeping his distance was the best thing for everyone. What Mom said… what she thought she’d seen from Cas… that was projection. Had to be.

Cas knocked at the door. “Sam?”

“Hey. I was just about to come find you. Come on in.” Sam sat back on the bed.

Cas came to sit beside him. “You said we needed to talk.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m so sorry about Lucifer. I should have known better than to take him at his word when he had so much to gain from the lie.”

Sam reached out to Cas, putting a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry I let you feel like you had to in order to be useful. You’re family, Cas.”

“That’s what Dean said.”

“Well, here’s something that might help you believe it. When we came to bust Lucifer out of Amara’s hold, I did not want to be there. I did not want to be in the same city as Lucifer, let alone the same room… let alone being the one to actually go get him.”

“I’m so…”

“Cas. Wait. The only reason I could make myself do it was because you were there. Abandoning Lucifer meant abandoning you, too, and I couldn’t do that. You’d saved me once. And I know you’d do it again if he tried anything.”

“If I could. He was… he was terrible after that. But I would have tried.”

Sam nodded. “I’ve been there. I know what it’s like. But I have faith that you would have done it. But that’s… Lucifer’s not what I wanted to talk about. I didn’t like your decision, but I don’t have to. You wanted to help, this was a way you could. I know what that’s like, too.”

“I regretted it almost immediately. I tried a couple times, after the Hand of God incident, to force him out, but… I couldn’t.”

“And, again, I know what that’s like.”

“So if not Lucifer, what did you want to talk about?”

Sam let his hand drop and looked down at his hands in his lap. “The hallucinations Toni put me through. It was so helpful, before Lucifer, those nights when I couldn’t sleep and you turned off NetFlix and we talked about all the crap we’ve been through. It really helped me to kind of… put it in perspective, make my peace with it. If you can’t hear it, I get that. You’ve been through a lot recently, too. And if you want to talk about it, I’ll listen.”

Cas reached over and took Sam’s fidgeting hands, forcing them to still. “If you want to talk, I’m happy to listen. You’re still doubting reality, aren’t you.”

“Yeah.” Sam glanced up quickly, but Castiel looked sympathetic, not disapproving. “I’m thinking talking about the hallucinations will help me work through them, see how this is different.”

“What did you see?”

“It started out with… with seeing everyone I love die. Mom, Dad, Dean, you, Jess, Kevin, Charlie… and I heard things. Some things that people have really said to me, some not. Calling me a freak, saying it was my fault that they were dead and it should’ve been me.”

“It’s not your fault, any of them. And it never should have been you.”

“I know you and Dean, at least, feel that way. But they were trying to break me, so of course I heard the moments when it hasn’t been like that.” Sam leaned into Castiel’s shoulder. “Those were bad, but I was able to fight through them. I knew they weren’t real. Nearly escaped. Should have escaped. I had a chance to kill her, and I didn’t take it.”

“Why didn’t you take it?”

“Because! She’s Men of Letters. I don’t know about the British version, but here, they were usually the good guys. And Dean and I… well, come on. From outside, our record looks really bad.” Sam turned his hand over. “The cuts there, that wasn’t them. That was me. Punching a mirror to fake a suicide. And then this one.” Sam pulled his hand free of Cas’s to show him the gash across it. “Cutting my hand to get some blood to really sell it.”

Castiel ran two fingers over the cut. “Do you want to keep it? To help you feel the pain better when you need to convince yourself you’re awake and dealing with reality?”

“It’s just a cut. I’ve had worse. But if you want to heal it, go ahead.” The wound sealed itself, and Sam smiled. “I thought Toni was unconscious. By then I already had the burned foot, so I couldn’t move fast enough, couldn’t fight hard enough to make it to the door before she did. That… of everything that happened to me down there, in that basement, hearing that door slam was the closest I came to actually breaking.”

“I’m proud of you, Sam. I know you wanted to die, thinking Dean was dead. It would have been very easy for you to have simply actually killed yourself instead of faking it to escape.”

“I thought about it. But you were out there looking for me, and I…” Sam trailed off, shaking his head. “I didn’t want to give that bitch the satisfaction.”

“I don’t care what your reasoning was, the point remains that you kept yourself alive. I don’t want to know what Dean would have done if you hadn’t.”

“Thanks, Cas.”

“What happened next? More hallucinations?”

“Yeah. Toni…” Sam bit his lip. “Playing on my guilt wasn’t going to do anything but piss me off, so she decided to come after me another way. I should’ve realized I was hallucinating, but… she freed me from my chains. Tended to my wounds, took me upstairs and put me in a bed. Got in with me, and…”

“I shouldn’t have let Mick leave with her. She deserves so much worse than whatever they’ll do to her.”

“In the hallucination, it was fine. It was… I wanted it. She nearly had me talking, too. But it started coming back to me what was really happening. She said she’d done some kind of spell, which she couldn’t do again or it would melt my mind, not that I believed her. That’s what I’m afraid of here. That she’s done the spell again and she’s expecting me to start reaching out to other hunters and warning them… which gives her what she wanted. Names and contact information of every hunter in America. I don’t know what it’s like in Britain, but apparently they’re a lot more organized than we are here.”

“That surprises you? Their Men of Letters are very active, not wiped out by Abbadon. It’s a small country with a long history of social order, unlike America, which places a much higher value on independences and personal freedoms, and is much more spread out.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s just kinda weird imagining hunting working any other way.” Sam trailed off again, squeezing Cas’s hands. “She taunted me about it.”

“About the different way things work here, or about what she did to you in the hallucination?”

“Both, really. She called us bad at our jobs. In Britain, monsters are apparently dead within forty minutes of hitting the border.”

“Any monster? Garth, Lenore, Amy, Benny, all dead for being monsters? That’s not being good at their job. That’s being too rigid to see other viewpoints.”

“Thanks.”

“And, Sam… it’s not your fault. What she did to you, that’s not your fault. I don’t care how good it felt or how much you thought you wanted it at the time. If Toni’s as good at her job as she says, then she would have been able to tailor her spell to do whatever she wanted.”

“I know. But I… I’m still ashamed of it. Her taunting didn’t help. I know I have no reason to feel bad, but I can’t help it.”

“That’s what this is for, right? Is it helping?”

“Yeah. Always does. After that, she went back to the physical stuff. I can do that. No problem. I don’t care how quick a study she is, Lucifer will always be better. When she brought Dean in, I assumed it was another round of hallucinations.”

“I don’t blame you. And then when your mother arrived…”

“Actually, that helped me believe it was real. If I were hallucinating, it would’ve been Jody or Claire or someone believable.”

“Not me?”

“The warding. If you could’ve gotten through, Dean wouldn’t have been captured – or at least, not captured alone. You coming in when you did, that’s what would have happened in the hallucination. Maybe a little earlier, but still, with Mick. Pulling Toni off us.”

“So I caused you to doubt again?”

“Just the fact that I got out of there has me doubting that any of this is real. But I’m pretty well convinced. I wasn’t kidding about not being able to hallucinate your new truck.”

“Were you kidding about liking it?”

“No. I really do like your truck.”

“Good.”

“I don’t know if you know this, but Dean apparently told Mom you were my boyfriend.”

Castiel shook his head. “When he introduced us. He immediately distracted me by trying to find you, and I didn’t want to draw more attention to it by bringing it up later even to tell her that Dean was just screwing around.”

“Well, Mom believed him.”

“Of course she did. Do you want me to talk to her?”

“Nah. She didn’t exactly believe me, so you doing it now probably isn’t gonna do anything to help.”

“As you wish.”

“At least she likes the idea. Thirty years ago, that isn’t something I’d have expected.”

“She likes the idea of you having a boyfriend, or me specifically?”

“Both. I think.” Sam huffed. “I know she likes you specifically.”

“Oh.” Cas looked down at their hands. “She’s going to draw conclusions about me being in here while you sleep, isn’t she.”

Sam shrugged. “That’s her problem. Hell, maybe Dean doesn’t believe us and wasn’t screwing with Mom. If you’re not here, I’m going to end up sleeping in the car tonight just to get some kind of sleep, and I'm getting too old for that.”

“If Dean does believe that we’re together, he’s been remarkably well-behaved about it. I would have expected him to tease you mercilessly.”

“True… although maybe he’s afraid that if he starts teasing, I start telling him things he doesn’t wanna hear. Or you do.”

“Maybe.” Cas fell silent for a moment. “Are you still doubting reality?”

“A little. More than usual, I mean. But that’s just gonna require time and grounding to fix. Okay?” Sam pulled away from Cas to stretch out on the bed. “Hey, um, I may have a moment of doubting reality in the morning. Fair warning.”

“I’ll be here. Help you through it.” Cas moved to lay beside Sam and turned on the TV.

 

Cas’s arm was strong around his back, but comfortable. Not like the ropes. Definitely not like the chair. His feet were warm, and there was no pain.

“Sam?” Castiel whispered.

“I’m awake. I think.” Sam scooted a little closer to Castiel. “I’m not freezing. Even in the hallucination with Toni, I was cold. For some reason they loved dumping cold water on me.”

“She probably enjoyed the sight of you wet and shivering.”

Sam chuckled. “Okay, I’d have expected that from Dean. Not you.”

“It’s either that or she knew that Lucifer runs cold and that being cold would get that in your mind. Personally, I prefer to think of her objectifying you than torturing you that specifically. It’s not like it’s hard to imagine why.”

Sam laughed. “Okay, now I think I must be dreaming. Because I could swear you just called me hot.”

“Well, you did say you’re not freezing.”

Sam lost it, burying his face in Castiel’s chest while waiting for the laughter to calm down. When he was finally back in control, Castiel was looking at him. “Would that be a good dream or a bad one?”

“What?”

“Me calling you hot.”

“Good dream. I… I mean…” Sam bit his tongue. “I blame Dean. And Mom.”

Cas raised an eyebrow. “How is your grip on reality this morning? Do you believe this is real?”

“Yeah. Yeah, Cas. I’m here, you’re here, when I make myself get up there’s a brother who I owe a smack to the head and my mom who’s been dead for the last thirty-three years. My life is profoundly weird, but it’s my life, not some drug-induced hallucination or a dream world.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“Yeah. Even better to live.”

Cas ran a hand through Sam’s hair. “I don’t want to have to have this conversation more than once, because I suspect it’s not going to end the way I want. But I do want to have the conversation.”

“Talk to me, Cas. What’s on your mind?”

“Dean. And your mom.”

“And what Dean told Mom and she still half-believes?” Sam pushed himself up a little. “Is the good ending agreeing that they have a great idea and we should do that, or us discussing the idea and deciding that while we can see where they might read something into things, we don’t feel that way about each other?”

“The first one. If you don’t feel that way about me, it’s perfectly all right, I certainly wouldn’t blame you. And this will be the only time I ever bring it up. But when Mary started treating me like your boyfriend… she never said anything overt or I would have corrected her, but it was clear that’s what she thought of me as. And I found that I rather liked it. Given our rather… contentious history, I don’t know that I’d have ever considered the idea without the push. But with the idea out there… I like it very much.”

“I… wow.” Sam laid his head back down on Cas’s chest. “I’ve been trying not to think about it, because I didn’t think there was a chance you’d ever feel that way about me, but I’ve kind of had it in the back of my mind since Gadreel. Right after Dean left, when we talked about peanut butter and jelly…”

“I remember. That was… that feels like a lifetime ago.” Castiel looked down, meeting Sam’s eyes. “So you like the idea too?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I do. I think we should do that.”

“Good. I agree.”

**Author's Note:**

> Smol Dean's threat to the friend's son is one I used in preschool. My brother and I are eighteen months apart, but the way birthdays worked, I started preschool the year after he did. Separate classes, adjacent classrooms, and the teachers would often have the door between the rooms open. One day I heard someone messing with my big brother and came flying through the door, tackling the kid, sitting on him, and informing him that if he ever messed with my big brother again, I would rip his ears off and stuff them down his throat. I got sent home, but luckily, my dad thought the two-year-old avenging angel was hilarious.
> 
> Comments always welcomed and treasured like kittens!


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